Well my band mates did not accept my challenge to describe themselves to you our adoring fan base. No, they are not imaginary. I have friends. Don’t worry; I will do my best to describe them for you. I will start with Aric. Here are some insightful observations about Aric that I think will draw a pretty accurate picture of the man.

1. When he laughs, milk comes out his nose though he insists he doesn’t drink milk.

2. He never leaves a building through the same door he came in by. If your house only has one door, don’t invite him inside. It is awkward.

3. When he drinks he becomes obsessed with whose dad can beat up whose.

Well that is all I know about Aric. All in all I’d say he is a good guy and one Hell of an American. I think I will describe John next so stay tuned.